What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it’s priceless. As I’m taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he’s the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years. She’s never taken another lover. I don’t care. I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier.

one of the best dwight quotes

(Reblogged from thumbswithhands)

Notes

  1. metheliving reblogged this from foxtrots and added:
    kayla-jane:thumbswithhands:
  2. sylviasylvia reblogged this from thumbswithhands
  3. boookface reblogged this from thumbswithhands and added:
    one of the best dwight quotes
  4. undercovertuna reblogged this from thumbswithhands
  5. foxtrots reblogged this from kayla-jane and added:
    Always makes me laugh.
  6. kayla-jane reblogged this from thumbswithhands
  7. failure33object reblogged this from thumbswithhands and added:
    the office? another reason to like you.
  8. thumbswithhands posted this